No Laughing Matter - A Career in Domestic Abuse
Meet Lucy
The first thing we need to clear up is that this is a different Lucy. I don’t know what the odds are for having two people with the same name on a team of just 20 or so, but that’s what has happened. It is inevitably the source of some confusion, so let’s get it straight from the start – this is not the daughter of our CEO, nor are they related in any way at all.
This Lucy joined My Sisters’ House as Team Lead for the domestic abuse service in November 2020 – while we were in lockdown. So for a while we all knew her just as the one who turned up to online team meetings looking rather blue (some kind of laptop camera problem it seems, which has fortunately since been resolved.)
At the time of my conversation with Lucy, we are in lockdown once again, talking via Zoom, and she acknowledges that it has been a bit of a strange time to join a new organisation. “I still haven’t met all the staff in person, and I’m aware that the service is operating very differently to how it does when fully open for face-to-face meetings.”
Lucy comes to My Sisters’ House from the IDVA service at Portsmouth City Council, and has a long history of work in domestic abuse. Her interest in the area was first piqued in her early twenties by stories she heard when volunteering as a Samaritan, and was further engaged when her work as a probation officer brought her into contact with both survivors and perpetrators. Since then she has managed a refuge and worked as an IDVA (Independent Domestic Violence Advisor) in the community, in hospitals, and representing women in multi-agency meetings. She has also spent time working at the perpetrator programme Drive.
Lucy first met Julie Budge (no relation, remember?) back when the latter was setting up My Sisters’ House, and she even attended one of the first meetings around that now legendary kitchen table. She has followed the story of the Centre’s development closely ever since, and even organised a fundraising comedy night to help fund a move to larger premises in those early years. So, although she hadn’t been looking to move job, and was just about to go back to work after maternity leave, when this role came up, “it all just fitted – it’s a cause and an organisation that I really believe in.”
We have to divert slightly here because the mention of that fundraiser reminds me that Lucy also performs stand up comedy. She explains that it all began when she was working in Brighton for the domestic abuse charity Rise, and staff were offered a free weekend course. That led to an invitation for her to perform in front of an audience, and she was hooked! “I’m normally quite a shy person, and performing makes me feel awkward – but something compels me to keep doing it.”
For five years Lucy ran her own comedy nights, and during this time she also appeared on national TV for a Children in Need comedy marathon, performed at the Edinburgh Festival, and had a solo show at the Brighton Festival. She explains that she particularly enjoys musical and character-based comedy, because, “when someone doesn’t like what I’m doing, it’s the character they don’t like, not Lucy.”
But that’s not the only outlet Lucy has to help her cope with the pressures of work and the harrowing stories she hears every day. “I have a good support network. I enjoy swimming – which I am really missing at the moment – and being close to the sea or in nature also helps me to destress.
I like coffee and cake [who doesn’t?] as well as cooking, music, socialising, travel, and musical theatre.”
When I say that I think she must be quite a brave person, Lucy admits that she is what you might call single-minded; she is sociable but also happy to strike out on her own, and not afraid to buck convention. She says that her inner strength helps when she is advocating for other people. “You need to be strong and passionate to stand up for people,” she tells me, and she feels a strong sense of justice as well as an abiding interest in the human condition, both of which are advantages when it comes to the work she does.
And so, despite the predictable confusions, the emails sent to the wrong Lucy, the constant need to explain how she really isn’t related to the CEO, we are delighted to welcome this – totally unique – Lucy Budge to the My Sisters’ House team. And we look forward to seeing more of her, in person, hopefully soon.